Hi Friends, am here to write something different from my other posts (Mostly 55 Fictions!). Just thought of writing a recent experience I had in Chennai! Check it out!
This Friday evening I went to T.Nagar for some purchase along with my sister. I was selecting some salwar khameez and suddenly a lady appeared out of nowhere. She came and took the chudi I have already selected. I approached her, "Aunty I have already selected this dress". She replied, "Oh is it? My daughter will love this dress. Why cant you select some other dress?". I was irritated, but controlled my rising temper and replied, "Why don't you do the same? I am telling you I selected this dress, but you are asking me to select something else. See, this is not fair!". She immediately called the floor manager and started complaining! The manager neared me, "Good evening madam. How can I help you. By the way what's the problem here?". I told him everything and called the person who was having the dresses I selected. He came forward and confessed that it was the lady who was creating the problems. The manager took the lady with him and was speaking something. I was tensed heavily because of the problems, my sister came near me and told, "hey relax, she is a crazy. Leave it and start selecting dresses. Its getting late.". I nodded and started selecting the dresses. Suddenly I felt someone is nearing me. I raised my head and ended finding the lady nearing me again. "hey what you are thinking of yourself? All these youngsters are very adamant Stupid's. How old are you? hardly some 20 or 21 right?" I nodded my head saying 'yes'. "Haan! But you have been brought up in a very wrong way. Don't you know how to respect elders? This is how you behave with elders? Will you do the same with your mom?". I got roiled. My sister replied, "Aunty, what's bothering you? Its you who created all the problems?! But why you are talking about our parents! We too know how to shout and make a scene but we don't want to behave like you!", she turned to me, "what you are seeing? Come, we will move. We are not here for any fights like others!". I was feeling very happy since that lady was speechless after my sister raised her voice.
After this incident I asked my sister to stand at the entrance and I went to take my scooter from the parking area. There was a heavy rush when I entered there. It appeared to me as if someone called me. I turned around and saw none. So I started my scooter. Suddenly I heard someone telling "Hey mom, wait here.. I think That's Shruti". When I heard someone uttering my name and stopped giving throttle and turned back. I saw a guy approaching me. 'OMG! I have seen this guy somewhere. But where? In college? Naah! School? May be. Yes! He is the one!'. He came near me.
"Yes am! You? But I have seen you somewhere."
"Hey, You forgot me? Am Anand. We studied in trichy."
'Yes. I got him. Its been a long time rite!'
"Errr... Am sorry Anand. How are you?"
"Thank God you remember me. Your face didn't change. So only I recognized you!! Girl, you are taller than me"
I Smiled and continued, "Hehehehe... Leave it da. Tell me how is aunty, uncle, your sister aarthi and Balaji"
"I am spell bounded! You remember everyone!! How Shruti?"
"Hey c'mon re! I remember everyone and everything! You shifted to chennai?"
By the meantime, Anand's mom came near me and asked, "Hi shruti.. How are you?"
"Am fine aunty. How are you?". The conversation went on and we walked towards the entrance where my sister was waiting. When I reached the entrance, I saw my sister flushing with anger!
"Hey dog, where you went off? Everyone was seeing me as if I got lost somewhere. Who is this?"
I couldn't help myself and I started giggling! "Hey am sorry ma. See Anand came to chennai! My classmate in trichy! Met him down there so it got late. Am sorry!"
Anand and his family were our neighbors in trichy and he considered my sister to be his little sister and used to call her Kutti (Small). He was very happy. He came near me "Hey is this kutti? She grew up na?!"
"Hi Kutti!"
"Hi na..(brother)"
They were speaking about their childhood secrets. She thought anand to be her bigger brother and would confess many things. Suddenly he turned towards me and started asking questions.
"So tell me how is aunty and uncle?"
We both saw each other not knowing to reply my friend!
I tried diverting the topic, "So got placed? When is DOJ"
I never knew he was noticing our facial expressions, "Shruti! I asked about aunty and uncle!"
"Anand dad is not in station"
"Aunty is still a teacher huh?"
I didn't know how and what to tell him. "hmmm.. Naah!"
"You mean she is a house wife huh? By the way, you both came alone for purchasing? Why aunty didn't come?"
"..........."
"Shruti? What happened?"
"mmmm... Naah! Nothing! Am fine"
Suddenly the lady stormed from the shop with another lady and saw me and Anand speaking. She came near me and spoke loudly "Oh God! These girls always roam around with lovers. They hug them closely and sit in bikes"
I thought 'OMG! She thought me and anand as lovers!'
She continued, "We can't find even a single good girl around here! All roam around with their boy friends! This girl and her sister fought with me inside the shop for a single dress! I too accepted my mistake and left it. Even I thought they are good girls. But after seeing this girl with this guy, am understanding everything!"
I was confused, 'Anand is my friend. Even his mom was standing near us. Am standing near my sister! How dare she thinks like this?!'
She was still speaking, "... She didn't come with her parents. Her sister also helps in her love I guess! See that guy, he is looking very decent. She cheated her parents and came off with her sister for seeing this guy!"
I understood she was saying wrong things about me only for the fight that happened inside the shop.
Anand face turned red with rage. He stepped forward to have a brawl with a lady. I caught hold of him and asked him not to make it a big issue. Anand's mom also told the same. That lady saw me like an extraterrestrial being. Only then I realized I was holding Anand's hand. 'OMG! What I have done. I have given flakes to an empty mouth!'
"Ahhhh... I told na, they are lovers! See that girl is holding that guy's hand! This girl......" (She was speaking something.. Am not willing to listen any such crap! I wanted to tell her, anand is my childhood friend!)
I went near her, "Enough aunty! Stop it! Even my friend's mother is standing near. Can't you see that? If am cheating then why the hell should we speak in front of our parents! Without knowing anything how come you blame me? Do we know each other before? Who gave you the rights to speak about me haan? Reply me! "
She replied casually, "haa! am seeing 1000's of girls like you everyday! They all cheat parents and come here and roam around! You are one among them. You are holding a guy's hand. You are moving in a society! You don't have that basic manners? Blah blah blah......"
Something in her words struck me hard! I bid goodbye to anand and his mom and reached home. After reaching home I was munching over the happenings of the days. I remembered I was feeling something disquieting about the lady's speech!
Yes. Its the word SOCIETY brought in a raw feeling inside me! Being a girl I know how to behave with guys and how to maintain my limits! Why people are behaving like this? Shouldn't a girl speak with a boy in public? Can't the guy be a close friend? Why girls are restricted for this? Even my mom has known all my friends. Speaking with a guy in public means its LOVE! OMG, Why people are still like this! Even I accept that some people in the name of 'Lovers' do certain atrocious things even being in public. But we can't stamp everyone is like that!
I don't know if the same condition prevails in all parts of India. But in our state its still there, When people are going to realize the true meaning for friendship? I remember a poem about friendship, i would love to quote it here and am dedicating it to all my friends!
Friends will come and friends will go,
The seasons change and it will show,
I will age and so will you,
But our friendship stays, strong and true.
- Author Unknown -
I hope I did justice for the 'Art of Writing' by taking up this real-life topic. Please feel free to express your views in my comments section!
With Love,
Image Courtesy : GOOGLE IMAGES
60 comments:
Girl......its pathetic really......
This lady is really bored in life and cannot control her JEALOUSY.
"Holding hands" is GOOD OR BAD depends on the situation and the person involved....
This highlights one very big aspect of Indian mentality: JUDGEMENTAL NATURE..........
My Aussie friend often complains about it....she is often surprised by this judgemental nature of Indians......
Sucks big time.
Thankfully Kolkata is different......"judgemental nature" still exist but certainly not to this level.....
had it been me in ur case the matter would have been done and dusted....i will bear any insults towards me as long as i am wrong...one word outside it i cannot stand them.....wat u wrote about society is perfectly true...as long as ur conscience is clear,it doesnt really matter....maybe she had a bad case for herself...that maybe the reason for her behaviour...good post:)...better than ur 55 fictions:P...
@Ip
exactly.
This judgemental nature of the people is still worse and we don't know when these issues will sort out!
I told na..
"I don't know if the same condition prevails in all parts of India. But in our state its still there"
its one such example!
@kaka
even i had the same rage of anger. I wanted to burst at that lady for telling me all those things! But again 'being a girl' prevented!
That guy was more like my own brother!
Glad that you liked this post!
Real pathetic fool...in marathi there is a funny saying...Swatahacha thevayacha jhakun, dusryacha pahayacha vakun...meaning...u hide ur stuff and den poke nose into others life..
d ladies own daughter must b going out wid 10 boys...but she will say something to others without knowing anything...Gosh, respecting elders...y d hell should we respect anyone just cos we r born late???
If u r born before us...y r u taking so much time to earn ur respect?
U clicked something...will post something...:D
P.s. I felt bad you did behaved decently there, such people there is only one cure. Be evil, may them repent ever word they say. Make them feel ashamed of them self.
It is really distressing fact, and more or less everywhere in India prevails. This is merely a justification of their condemnation that they have to feel from the society. The lady, that you have mentioned is really frustrated, supressed and saying such things to you is just a way to satisfy her frustrated mind.
But you know, we have to ignore such people, be pitiful on such depressed souls.
Morality is not a belief; It is thought. Be aware of such people who imposes morality.
In between, I enjoyed reading it. :)
really very good post..
:)
cheers!!!
@Sid
i have to move decently or else it would have earned me a bad name!
Btw,you are getting idea from my posts and posting on your blog eh?!
hmmm...
Copyrights reserved with me!
@amit
i was reading your post and commenting there..
yes its prevailing everywhere. But who is bothering about it! People don't know the real friendship! And people don't respect other's feelings.. They take everything and munch over those issues!!
Am glad that you liked this post!!
keep smiling!
Tht was pathetic.. i evn heard recent news reports about colleges in tamil nadu where guys nd girls r not allowed 2 talk 2 each othr, thy hav 2 sit on seperate benches nd blah blah.. i thot media was over-exagerrating bt reading this post i realise its sumwat true..
Though Indian society as whole is cnsrvative bt thrs no sch issue of guys n girls speaking in public in chndigrh.. though u may not see scenes like couples kissing openly like on bandstand in mumbai, bt still thrs lot of openness.
@Vipul
even i know about those media attention! But the thing was i experienced it practically. people's minds are still on the late 60's!
People are still not ready to accept the truth of life, truth of friendship!
Even i have seen couples hugging each other while going in bike! I felt disgusted! But i was speaking with my school mate, along with his mom.. But still i appear as a sort of girl who behaves indecently in public!
Even if i say this issue to someone, they will tel "you did a mistake. you should not have spoke with a guy!"
who will understand a girl?!
Someone said it right - when elephant walks, thousands of dogs bark... dont listen to the dogs... keep moving :)
Nice topic... and a very good attempt :)
A very good topic and so interesting to read. I think you did right.
Here in the UK things are not like that but I appreciate in other countries and cultures certain asspects are different.
Take care.
Yvonne.
Typical south indian mentality. She must have belonged to an age group where kissing was symbolised by two flower dashing each other hahaha.
whatever you do they will remain the same we will grow and do it to people are babies now and youngsters tomorrow and do the same but in a different way.
Btw are you tall or is he short ;)
Hi Shruti!
I came across such persons in my life too; nearly 5 years back, I was travelling to Kodaikanal with my wife. My daughter was 1 year old then, she could not accompany us. They were playing some romantic songs in the bus. Although, we were sitting next to each other, there was a reasonable space between us. Then we were hearing two elderly people seated at the back of our seat, started talking. They are the real losers in life. They were talking about the songs (like who cares to listen to these melodious songs, blah blah). Then they suddenly started mentioning that these songs are suitable for lovers like us (ofcourse, we are lovers; but licensed lovers). They started talking all unnecessary stuffs like society is spoilt and things like that. At one point, I got really offended and wanted to bawl at them. My wife signalled me to be calm.
In one of the stations enroute, we have seen a old lady standing near to us and out of courtesy, I stood and given place to her. Then I got a good chance and lashed at those elders.
But lotsa ppl's mentality is just like that; we can't change. In your case, I presume that lady should have been hysterical or should be having some mental trauma. She would have used anything against you in that moment, when she came outside. If she had seen you and your sister alone, she would have told, "Are you still waiting here to start another fresh arguement with me?" things like that.
Good narration from your side Shruti; cheer up :)
Hey that was a nice post and you have described the situation really well. Happened to me too exactly the same way...first of all a so called 'aunty' was trying to have a fight with me and started commenting on me having male friends and all when nothing else worked. Sadly she got a bad dressing down from me and I doubt if she can recover soon :)
I really don't like these quarrelsome aunties :P
What a creep u bumbed into in the shop ? This lady shud be packed to sach ka saamna show and all her skeletons in her closet would come out :D
Lakshmi Rajan
www.gingerchai.com
Shruti I think this is a problem in evrywhere but a bit more in TN.... but I wonder How do these 'cultured people' react to your movies I mean... you understand Where I am trying to go...
Don't mind these things you have done what you should have done and the woman might have her own issues maybe so she speaks like that....
Finally on a lighter note " So only I recognized you!! Girl, you are taller than me" - 'so only' is very typical Chennai English ....I have heard so many of Chennai friends speak it :D
So Life is better than Fiction or rather 55-Fiction in your case ...he he he..
While reading this post half way through, especially when you said Anand was with his mother, I thought his mother would be the lady who had a fight with you inside. (Your 55 fiction rub off effect :-))
Regarding the situation, even if a girl is speaking with her boy friend, it is her private matter. No one has any right to intervene in this unless otherwise if the pair is creating nuisance. It seems that lady is psychologically affected by the love affairs of her beloved ones. It seems very uncultured behavior for me.
as bharathi said..I felt that lady was none other than anands mom...It would have been great...If it was anands mom....
I have faced hell a lot of situations like this....
About the situation.... There are 2 types to deal this:
TYPE 1: Dogs can only bark...like that lady..It wont be nice if we bark back at dogs...so just ignore and go....
Type 2:
The reason is they speak out of agony.. In those days they didnt get a chance to roam with boys or a girl..being a friend to the opposite sex is very impossible in those days... But we are having freedom to move around now a days..thats bothering them a lot... they are jealous.... I would have handled the situation in a different manner shruthi..so that they wont even think about repeating this in future.... i would say "you didnt fight back or your fight was not effective"
I belong to second type....I never give respect based on age.. but only based on their behavior and nature...
Nice shruthi to quote a real life situation ....
wat s prevailing in this society we live now...
each one having their own perceptions and mainly many having wrong views on opposite sex friendship..
Hope we build our own society in future , which s n our hands
Regards,
Prasee
This is not typical to South Indian families.We do face almost similar situations in Delhi and nearby towns.Best attitude is to avoid the scene and continue with what is right for you.
@shashank
you are exactly right with that proverb!
But in some instance we are pushed to a situation to react!
@yuovne
thanks for visiting my profile continuously and appreciating it!
:)
@venky
dashing of flowers :-)
i can find that in kamal's movie :)
When we grow and try to teach these people again we will receive the same as bouncer!!
"See how they are speaking! They don't have manners!"
for your question:
am tall so he is shorter than me!
@musings
migh!
that mustta been embarrassing for you! The society doesn't accept a girl and boy being friends!
She was perfectly in her senses and only when her DiL came, she left the argument!
@kasabian girl
yeah girl..these aunties are always troublesome!!
infact she made me to write ths post in a decent manner!
thanks for visiting!
@Mr.R
:P
It will be a better punishment than we shouting at them and wasting our time!
keep visiting!
@dmanji
people won't change unless their mentality change!
on your lighter note-i too saw that only after publishing! But left it for the reason "none will study it so interestingly!!"
but you studied and i got caught :P
Lolzz at your last point :P
@Bharathi
it seems my 55Fictions created a great impact in your life :-P
you atarted seeing the thing the other ways! Good to hear that :-P
YES!! I completely aggree with you!! But when will our people understand the basic discipline "DON'T POKE INTO OTHERS LIVES!"
Its a high time these people get back to their senses!
@shankz
you are right!
but if i have staged a fight there for her poking she would have still talked so much!! I don't wanna put up a long fight! So i fought but i dint!!
Hope you understand- IRUKKU AANA ILLA!
@prasee
thanks for the visit!
@chowla ji
"Best attitude is to avoid the scene and continue with what is right for you"
thats what i did!!
thanks for the visit!!
@suga
hey hieee :)
welcome 2 my blog!!
glad that you liked it!!
keep visiting!
@suga
hey am really glad!!
you made my day!!
thank you!
may be this could answer ur question..
when it comes to love or friendship "GALS DONT HAVE THE FREEDOM BOYS HAVE"
I dunno whether this wud ever change bot for our generation we have to cope with this harsh reality
Hi Shruti, Nice post! We have this problem in our society! You highlited it nicely! Just ignoring is better for peace of our mind as we have a conscious. These so called orthodox do not have it!So it is hard to won in fight with them!!
I liked your blog very much. Its very nice and I appreciate for your lovely post.
You are welcome in my blogs.
Hi Sruthi..just a simple question!
Why you blog? Give me just one answer.(that will be enough)
&
Why I should blog?
Give me ten choices. I plan to blog or write. But it needs a right motive.
Good Luck. Keep going!
Kudos..Praveen.
@satish
welcome to my blog yaar!
you were right about this--GALS DONT HAVE THE FREEDOM BOYS HAVE!!
But why it is still like it?
Noone can answer this question!
btw,thnx for following me!
@pra
thanks for those comments and even if we ignore them at that time,their words will still hurt us!
This is the postion of girls in our society!
@babli
thanks for visiting my profile. Am happy that you liked my blog and posts!
yeah sure will visit!
Keep visiting!
@praveen
hi yaar!
welcome to my blog!
i think you have not read my blog,i wrot in my blog description that--"For me, writing is exploration; and most of the time, I'm surprised where the journey takes me."
am learning my other perspective with the art of writing!
Well Written
We just need to ignore such ppl , but the society is changing our generation is far more open minded than the previous....
Keep Writing and Smiling
Arnav
@arnav
thank you for dropping by and commenting!
Hey Shruti...sorry ya for the late comment..but ya i agree its the society that makes up all this and our state is the worst hit if yu ask me! i cant believe that she had the guts to yell like that, i dont think yu shud have been quiet like this and come.... we just go quiet then everyone thinks thats the truth!! hmm pavam neenga...feel sorry for yu..anyways dont muse abt the lady... she aint helpin us in anyway...so dont worry tak care..!
@hary
exactly!!
U caught the right point!
Hi Shruti
Good post. But its not a serious issue. That 'aunty' is a creature of past. Times are changing and so are people. Perhaps in ten years things wont be the way they are now. Had i come across a person like her I'd have a healthy laugh. Or maybe asked her if she had a daughter and could she give her phone number. Just to instigate her. :)
@abdul
hi, Thanks for visiting!
good method re!! :D
Hey! it was a nice post. No use arguing with such socially demented people.
@shas
thank you once again!
You should have done a simple thing-laugh aloud-laugh till you cant control yourself an am sure your friend anand, his mom and your sister would have joined you and see that aunty go red :D.
Such society moral policing needs this behavior :D . I make sure , I laugh at them LOUD enough for them to whine all day at home ;)
Oops.. damage panita chennai ah!!! But true..still ppl r here who find it difficult to differentiate luv n frdshp..N shruti Cheers to u r true frdshp..keep writing..:)
@aditya
i was getting furious that time, so dint think loudly that moment!!
Next time ll do that!
@benny
hey chennai ah damage panala pa.. inga irukra people oda mentality ah dan damage pannen ;)
I ll keep typing lol :P
hey girlie.. hadnt come across this post earlier.. that's really sad! I know, when is society gonna understand that a girl and a guy can even be FRIENDS? My granny did the same mistake once when a friend of mine came home.. she started asking him his caste etc thinking he is my BF..lol..
@ashwini
This society is damn sick! They can't understand the meaning of true friendship! When are they gonna realize it!
""she started asking him his caste etc""
I had a good laugh! But it must have been embarrassing for you na?!
Yeah!!! my dad covered up the situation thankfully describing her that he was my "classmate".. but it was embarrassing for me and him..poor fella
@ash-win-i
If its not dad,then you must have felt still bad!!
:)
Hey... If someone behaves riduculously like this, the best way is to stay silent. U know one thing??? Being silent to such people is the best way to insult them.. Even if they get to realize their fault one day, they feel regret for themselves and glad about us being silent...
Our society has grown up a lot to see the healthy friendship b/w girls n boys... but still a long way to go...
@Bala
Correct only...but when she was speaking dementedly, i tried my level best to control her! But too much ah pesitta!!
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