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Thursday, October 8, 2009

Catch your seats and Read it!


DISCLAIMER : TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT. Those who like reading fictions, carry on..

Confused by the title eh? Read this and find out the reason for this title.

THEN

Rohit, me(Rishi) and Pranav were final year engineering students and we were best pals from their first year. It was a pleasant evening and Rohit, me and Pranav where trying to concentrate on their Mobile communication class. Don't raise your brows guys, Atleast we were trying to listen to the blabbering's of their lecturer. Me and Rohit started laughing after seeing Pranav's red eyes, he got up in the mid of the class after singing a duet with Priety Zinta (that's how he told us). I saw the teacher pointing to us and telling, "You three dumb heads get out of my class. Pranav, you come to the college only for sleeping eh?". Our hero dozily replied, "Dude, Priety calling me...err...Ma'am, thanks..Hehehehe..Priety..here comes your darling Pranav". He spoke irrelevantly. Ma'am asked us not to come for another one week to her class. We spent our Mobile communication classes in our college canteen. One day, Pranav asked in between his munching, "Dude, what you both think about Ghosts?". Water spilled down from my mouth and I kept the tumbler in bench and saw Rohit. He casually looked at me. We both wanted to know Rohit's opinion. He told, "Hey I don't believe in Ghosts man". Pranav told, "Rishi, now its your turn. Tell me. Do you believe them? The Ghosts?". I thought for a while and replied, "I believe in Ghosts". He smiled back at us and replied, "Whatever guy's, according to me If God is there, Ghost is there". We changed the topic and we never discussed that topic again.

AFTER 6 YEARS - NOW

Life has been a roller-coaster for all 3 of us. I am working as a Computer Scientist in a MNC. Pranav became an entrepreneur and he is running a company giving Business Solutions and finally Rohit, when I last heard from him, before 4 years, he was planning to settle down in UK. But he promised both of us that he will keep in touch. But he never kept them.

It was a busy Monday morning and I was getting ready for office. Pranav called me and told he is getting married. He also told me that Rohit is coming to India by that time for attending the marriage. We thought Pranav's marriage will be an occasion for our re-union. But fate had something in stock for me. My boss rejected my leave request and I lost the chance of catching up with my friends marriage.

On the D-Day, I got up earlier and wished Pranav. He told Rohit came last night and was sleeping. I was missing all those gala moments. A week has gone by, I was sitting in front of my lappie and seeing all Pranav's wedding Photos. I was wondering why Pranav didn't speak to me about his marriage. I thought he might be in the romantic mood. So I didn't disturb him. 'Ting-Tong', 'Someone came I guess. huff..', I uttered these to myself, got up from the chair, checked the watch which read 4PM (I did all these simultaneously) and I moved to the door. To my surprise it was Rohit. I was overjoyed on seeing him. We both hugged each other and extended the pleasantries. He spoke about everything we did in our college days and suddenly asked, "Rishi, do you remember the time when we spoke about the existence of Ghosts in our college?". I thought for a while, giggled and replied, "Yeah Rohit! I remember now! But why you are asking about that now?"

I saw drops of sweat on his face and guessed something was wrong. I continued, "Rohit? What happened?". He looked straightly into my eyes and told, "I too believe in Ghosts now Rishi". I was amused by his reply and he told about something which made him to arrive at this conclusion. I asked him to tell his account. "Rishi I think you know I went for Pranav's marriage. After the marriage his family planned a ritual in his native, which happened to be a village. Pranav compelled me to come there. After we reached the destination, his family started their routine ceremonies. We all took part in that. Later Pranav and me went around the village for sight seeing. A particular place was deserted. Pranav understood my thoughts and recounted that, a girl in her early twenties was murdered by her in laws in a open well in that place. After her murder, the girl's spirit was seen there and it is believed that she is calling everyone who passes by that area to come there. If they volunteer themselves, those people are haunted and they die that instant". I felt a lump in my throat. Rohit went on enunciating them, "Ahh.. What happened Rishi? Relax. You know that I don't believe in ghosts. I laughed the moment Pranav narrated the entire story. He looked at me thoughtfully and we came back to our lodging area. But I became curious and wanted to prove everyone of you that Ghosts doesn't exist". I said, "Man, you have that dare. Tell me what happened then". Rohit laughed and continued, "You still have that curious nature like me haan? coming to the point.. I roamed around the village alone around 7PM yesterday. I happened to go near that well. My queer nature further added to this and I reached the place. It was like a haunted house and there were cobs everywhere. I guess nobody took care of that house after that gory murder. I reached the place near that haunted well and you know what? I saw a pretty chick....Ahhhh don't look at me like that. She was looking damn sexy with those perfect curves. When I went near her, my conscience battled with my state of mind and made my mind realize that it was the spirit of that Lady. I saw a Ghost with my naked eyes Rishi. Wish all ghosts are sexy babes. I BELIEVE IN GHOSTS NOW. THEY EXIST"

I was dumb-struck after hearing those descriptions about the Ghost. It seemed so real to me. Rohit told, "Now, stop dreaming of that pretty chick..errr...Ghost. How about having a shot?". I stood up and asked, "Whiskey or Vodka?". "I will be fine with chilled beer. Its hot Rishi.". Later we spoke about our nature of work and our life. We even discussed about our late night studies with a shot of vodka. Rohit checked his watch and told, "Time to go man. Had a nice time with you after a long period I guess. Wish Pranav also came here. No worries, Chill up and give me a hi-5". We hugged each other and I went along with him to the door. He waved me back and started his car. I was cherishing the fantastic moments with Rohit. My mobile started blaring up and it brought me back to the senses. I took up the mobile and saw Pranav's name flashing in there. I took up the call with a smile in my face.

"Ho Rishi bhai, Kaise hai aap?"
"Hey ya Pranav ji. Am fine. How have you been doing? Seems you are enjoying life tremendously. Wish I was there with you."
"Missed you badly Rishi. We all came to native for a ritual. Rohit also came here"
. He started telling me the same Ghost story Rohit recited a few minutes back. I was smiling myself and thought of giving a shock to Pranav by telling that Rohit came to my house for seeing me. I could hear him telling, "...she was murdered by her own in-laws. My wife tells....haunted place.......We all told Rohit about this. Know what? As usual he giggled and made fun of us....". I thought to myself,'Poor boy, he didn't know how beautiful the ghost was. Wish I can marry that Sexy Chick'.

Pranav shouted, "You there? Reply me.."
I replied, "Yes yes am very well here."
Again he started narrating the incident without giving me the space for telling that I knew everything through Rohit. "...yesterday after the function was over, after 7PM Rohit asked me to come for sight-seeing. I told my mom won't allow. He shook his shoulders casually and went off. He got curious the moment I told about the well in that deserted place. I guess he went near the haunted well. Today morning around 11am villagers found Rohit's body inside the well.......". Those last words stunned me. An eerie silence crept into my heart.

So how was it? Enjoyed your stay?

With Love,






Image Courtesy : Google Images

58 comments:

Unknown said...

the way you have written is good shruthi...But other than that I dint like the concept of the story much...

Anyway no worries.... good narration...

Shruti said...

@Shankar!
Thanks :)
Don't like this concept? Or in general you don't like fictions eh?

Anoop said...

Hey...i seriously forgot tat its a fiction..hehehe... when u say 'me' 'me', i always think somethin like this happened... khe khe khe...

its nice.. its interestin n u know we ll feel like readin the whole thing. But u could have made the 'THEN' part a bit short... jus a suggestion.. :D

but overall its nice... bit lengthy though... :P
but its fine... i liked it... :D

Shruti said...

@Anoop
Hi!!
You feel as if it happened eh? :D

THEN part bit short? May be!!
Thanks for your wishes. Stories are always long!!

Aditya Kasavaraju said...

Its very well written with nice twists and interesting all through the story.

Yes, you could do much much better with the plot (I am not talking about writing but the plot) because the plot is very common one among ghost stories. But writing wise, good one shruti :)

Shruti said...

@Adi
Thanks adi!!
Plot-could've been better
Writing-better
Will take these inputs and work on this the next time!

Guria said...

Shtuti,

It is a good story. A bit give away but good. But you are a better narrator than this, yaar. The narration didn't exactly sound like that of a guy/boy/man, you understand. I'm telling you this because you execute fiction much better than this. I hope you didn't mind me saying this.

Enjoyed it anyways. :)

Love, G.

Shruti said...

@Guria
Thanks! Will improve the next time!
""The narration didn't exactly sound like that of a guy/boy/man""
Ahhh!! I think it had that girlie tinge! So sorry for disappointing you!

Guria said...

Shruti,

I knew you'd say "disappointment". I wasn't disappointed, you crazy girl! :)
I just said you write much better. You have that ability to enthral which is a tad bit missing here, that's it!
I am partial to your write just as always! :)

Love, G.

Chetan Maheshwari said...

good one,
enjoyed reading it

Shruti said...

@Guria
you have understood me well it seems!!
Thanks a ton for having that belief in me. Will enthrall you in my next post Sreya!!
:)

Shruti said...

@Chetan
Thanks yaar!!

HaRy!! said...

nala pei kathai...enoda paatti solra mathiri iruku...nice unveiling and the narration but the ending i felt quite obvious and yu cud have hyped it more...neverthless...nala narration!

Soin said...

technical doubt.. pey vodka adikumbothu where did it dissapear?? and like others say could do much better..free

Shruti said...

@Hary
Will do it better next time!
Thanks Hary!

Shruti said...

@Soin
Pei beer than saptudhu! Not vodka! It didn't go anywhere!!

Mahesh Aadhya Kalal said...

Good attempt....Could have been better.....may be because its bit predictable like all other ghost stories....

Shruti said...

@Mahesh
Thank you so much!

Mustaf said...

This is good but not as good as your previous attempts.Mostly the way you tell a story (which is ur USP i believe), was missing here, the binding you know what i am trying to say.And somehow while reading the 2nd last para, it was kind of understood what the ending would be, only whether it will be Rohit or Pranav was unknown. But i guess this was "law of average", so ur next one shd be a bumper one :)

Shruti said...

@Mustaf!
I don't know how to react!! Am really sorry for not able to satisfy all your expectations! Will write a better one next time!

Raj said...

Grrr...the idea of a hot chic was cool. :P
the idea of rohit dying was cooler. just 1 flaw. wud u mind me pointing that?

and yes i totally enjoyed my stay here.

Shruti said...

@Scarlet diaries
Hey thanks a ton!
What is the flaw? tell me...go ahead

Raj said...

um...its ignorable forget it. its prefectly well written post dont let me spoil it.

Shruti said...

@Raj
Many said it was not upto the expectation! I wanna know that ignorable flaw! I can be flawles next time

Guria said...

You know Shruti, I just wanted to tell you, that every post cannot be your best post. But this was good nonetheless. But you can always do better. Right?
Just dropping by again :P
You can shoo me you know! :)

Love.

Kay said...

Guess your a believer now! perfect for this time of year, halloween approaching and ironically captivating as I am reading this blog taking a break from the book 'Mystery of Grace' by Charles de Lint.... a haunting read of a girl who has past and lives in the 'after life' bravo, to you!

Shruti said...

@Guria
I know!
I am giving my best these days! But why? That's what i wonder!
I won't shoo away this cute misfit girl!

Shruti said...

@kAY
AM not a believer. I thought of writing a fiction on thinking of haloween and wrote this!
Thanks

Siddhesh Kabe said...

interesting post!!!

Shruti said...

@Sid
I know you are trying to cheer me up! This is neither interesting nor good

Anonymous said...

not interesting as your 55Fiction's , otherwise like it...

Yellow Tulip said...

good one dear:)

Shruti said...

@Vijay
55F are short, these are long :)

Shruti said...

@Yellow tulip
Thanks sweety

Anonymous said...

Good one girlie.. but I kinda had guessed the ending.. I liked the narration a lot though.. you narrate stories really well!!

Shruti said...

@Avada
not a gud one girlie! I thought something and write something!!

Sorcerer said...

a good one!

Shruti said...

@Sorcerer
Welcome to my space!!
Thanks a ton!!

Unknown said...

omg!good attempt!
the climax was ver nice..:).

Unknown said...

anda rohit a vida maatiya??!!

Rachana Shakyawar said...

@ Shruti
Although not commented ever to your blog...I have been following your blog since last few months. Everytime I read your posts u surprise me with your wonderful ideas and thoughs!

For me Love is Miracle,needless to say it is always Unconditional:)


Hope to follow U more frequently..

Keep the spark Alive..
~Rachana Shakyawar
Humming Today

Makk said...

i knew ....its climax...

poor try...but nice try ..

Keep trying..lolzz

Shruti said...

@Sri
peikku pei kadhai pidikuthey!
Adada achirya kuri :P
Thanks sri!

Shruti said...

@Sri
Hey, rohit ah yepdi vidrathu!!

Shruti said...

@Rachna
Am completely speechless after reading your comment yaar!! I had a silent spectator for my blog! Am feeling happy!!
Welcome to my space and hope you enjoy your stay here!!

Hoping to keep the spark alive,
~Shruti

Shruti said...

@Makk
Let me try to understand your comments too!!

Madman said...

I actually think the opposite of shankar. I felt the concept was good but narration lacked punch.

Madman said...

ana build up laam konjam over shruti enter here enna ithu ennamo pei veedu mari gapsa vidara.

Shruti said...

@Venky
Even i felt the narration was what i created a havoc!!

Shruti said...

@Venks
Sari sari vidu vidu!

The Aspirant said...

awesum wrk shruti.........
dese things really sumtyms make me think wad if i face any one of dem.......

gud wrk, keep it up

nd m really srry dat i can't come up wid ur tag till nw, bt really m damn bsy frm last 2 mnths.....vl do it first thing weneva i get tym...

cheers

Prads said...

Nice difrnt approach ...
good attempt...
good naration ....
waiting for more thrillers like this


Regards,
Prasee

Shruti said...

@Aspirant
hey thanks buddy!!
Hey no probs yaar..do it when u find time and drop a note!

Shruti said...

@Prasee
Thank you!

Anonymous said...

Hey Shruti... Neenga ippadi pannuveenganu nenakave illa... enna ithu?? ivlo nalla ezhuthurukkeenga...

Even I got to guess the climax somewhere at the middle, you have maintained the mood of the fiction genre till the end...

So I guess that you believe in ghosts... Am I right???

Shruti said...

@Bala
ivlo nalla va? Comedy panadhenga bala!! Saw comments? All told it was nt my best :(

I love paranormal science!!

Anonymous said...

May be since this is your first story that I've read, I gave you these comments... But for me, the story looked good...

Shruti said...

@Bala
Hey thanks nanba :)

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