55 Fiction - #30

55 Fiction is a form of micro fiction that refers to the works of fiction limited to a maximum of fifty-five words.Most 55 Fiction works are dramatized so as to get the effect in limited time.

LETTERS

It was the last letter. She wanted to finish it soon.
It read : “I’m sorry mom – I loved him...”
It was punctuated by many sobs from the old lady.
“.... I can’t live without him, and so I’ve decided……… ”
She broke down – like she had every day for the past twelve years.

With Love,

Image Courtesy : Google Images

A letter

I don’t know whether I can stop thinking about you. In fact I don’t think I want to...

He sat down in a coffee shop and began writing a note to her.

There have been times in my life I have sulked for meeting some people, sometimes I was happy. But I felt blessed, happy, puzzled, excited the day I met you. Some have stayed on for a while and some left in a hurry. But you’re the one whom I love (d) with all my heart and I don’t think I have ever felt this way before. I have wanted to tell all this to you for a while now, but never really got along doing it. Enough is enough. Today, I just want you to know how I feel about you.

After taking a deep drag from his cigarette he thought for a while and continued writing.

I wouldn’t say it was love at first sight. Because my feeling towards you had already started even before I met you. I saw myself smiling when I read a text from you; I pictured the glint in your eyes when you laughed while talking to me on the phone. The way you wrote to me in your mails, I could sense your presence next to me and the words flowing effortlessly. I thought the feeling was mutual, may be I imagined something? But I don't care, I liked you. That's enough for me as of now. Meeting you was the only thing left.

He tried taking another puff, but the cigarette had gone off by then. He lit it again and chucked the matchstick aside. Looking at the smoke, he smiled to himself and exhaled the smoke. He looked at the rings the smoke made. He thought for a second, 'Is this smoke trying to teach me something? Yeah, it indicates, life is a full circle, but smoke? My life is hazy..'. His eyes were moist.

What's all this that am going through now? If I have to put words to this feeling that am experiencing, it would have to be ‘Pain, a pain with some peace’, a pain which I don't regret for experiencing. I feel happy every time I think about you and it’s even more painful when you are not here with me. I want to tell you that you make me really happy. I want to see that smile on your face forever. I know I can make you smile. But do you think the same?

'Would she even read this? Would she understand all this, all my feelings?' Those were his thoughts while penning this for her. He stopped writing. He read the lines again and again slowly. He read it out loud. He paused and stopped in places where he wanted her to stop. He closed his eyes and saw her. A smile escaped his lips. She still had this spell on him. That's why he called her An Angel.

I remember the time when we sat in my house and spoke. About life, about your school days, chocolates, crushes, mom, dad, drinks, pubs, parties, the things which we want to do in our life, our goals, our plans. I remember the passion - passion to achieve in your eyes when you told me the things you wanted to do in life. It all seems like yesterday that you were with me. And now when I think about it, I feel that it has been a while since I saw you or heard from you.

He was feeling emotional now. His hands were trembling. The third cup of coffee that he had ordered was now cold and almost over. The packet of cigarettes that was on the table next to him was almost over and ash tray was full. He closed his eyes again and was thinking about what to write next. He thought and slipped back to the past, He saw her standing in those salwars before him. Looking as beautiful as ever. Tringgg... Tringgg his mobile rang continuously. He shook his head and came back to the real world. He switched off the phone and settled down for writing.

I want you to know that I will always be there for you, yeah honey, forever. And I want you to be happy in life. I want you to go out there and achieve everything that you always wanted to. I want you to know that everything that I have ever told you I meant with all my heart. I want you to…I want you. I love you so much sweetheart, my Angel.

Without his knowledge his love for her, a drop of tear escaped from his eyes and signed the letter. He took one long look at the letter and sighed. He folded the letter and scribbled 49 on the back of the cover. 'One more and I will hit a half century'. The thought made him give a weak smile.

He placed the cover in a bag. There were a bunch of covers in that bag. He placed this one next to number 48. He finished the last cup of coffee, paid the bill and left the shop. On the way he took a long puff and smiled at the swirls it produced.

With Love,

Image Courtesy : Google Images

This is more than a Story..

This is purely a Fiction. Any resemblance of incidents or characters occuring in this story is purely co-incidental.

Guy's, this would've happened in our life at some point. This is just a post, that kindles all your emotions.

Time and time again, I forgave you. I've forgiven you for things that I swore to myself I'd never forgive someone for... and here you are, still hurting me, and I still forgave you..

"Ever noticed that the people who hurt you the most are the ones you tend to love more", she said as I finished my cup of coffee. Nandini was heartbroken and was madly in love with a boy she met in her college. She was badly hurt because the guy ditched her! She was hurt and demanded answers for some of the very obvious questions of life. She wanted to know why we all fall for someone. Isn’t it unfair on part of the God to first make us fall for someone and then teach us how to forget him? Tell me how can I forget him now? She asked me.

I sat there in front of her carrying a heart that has experienced love and loss more than anyone else I thought. Memories of my past just flashed in front of me and I couldn't help but revisit those memories just to tell her how love sometimes teaches you the best lessons you wouldn't learn otherwise. Sometimes - no matter how long, or how much you love someone, they will never love you back and somehow you have to learn to be okay with that. I began my story to pacify her.

I met this guy Rakshit in my school back in my 8^th class. He was one of my closest friends in school. We were in the same class till 12 when I moved out to pursue engineering at some other place and he continued his medical studies there itself. By the time I was in 12^th, we had spent enough time to know each other very well. We did some projects together in school that brought us more close to each other. I was sure that I had some very intense feelings for him but those never translated into words because I was not ready for it. I was a child back then, didn't know what love actually means. What I knew was that, there was a guy who makes me happy all the time, there was a guy whose happiness meant more to me than my own, there was a guy who impressed me beyond limits with his charm and intellect!

The time had come for us to part as the schools finished.
"I would like to thank you, for showing me a part of myself that I have never seen. Yeah we were young and dumb, but it still was fun and I guess these things just tend to fall apart and I hope you feel the same" was my message to him as we bid farewell to each other promising to be in touch forever!

I took my friendship for granted. I never confessed my love for him for I wasn’t sure. I thought it might be temporary like the one we term infatuation. I was sure I will move on. It was my confidence in my ability to find happiness in new days, new places and in people that desisted me from proposing to him that time and later, I knew I was wrong.

Life after school wasn't much easy. It was a new place, new people. As time passed, I realized I was missing him. There was vacuum in my life and something inside me wanted to talk to him, see him. I was frustrated because I couldn't tell if it was real. Mad because I didn't know how he felt. Upset because we couldn't make it right. Sad because I needed him. Aggravated because he wouldn't understand my feelings. Disappointed because we couldn't be together, but still I thought I loved him more than ever. A year had passed by then. I contacted him at times but mostly we were busy in our own separate worlds.

One day, almost a year later I picked up my phone and called him up
"Happy Birthday Rakshit" I said.
"Thanks Sreya, How are you?" he replied back. Formal questions followed the conversation and I sensed some change in his attitude towards me. I didn’t know what it was. I avoided reaching to any conclusion all by myself.

From someone I came to know that he knew I had feelings for him and he was upset and "angry", because I betrayed his trust(?) and friendship(!). I enquired this from our common friends but no one could tell me the reality.

I thought I might lose him if I ever tell him about myself now. Gradually, we both started settling in our own lives. I tried calling him a few times but every time he answered only my questions and the conversation was no more than a formality. I wanted him to at least tell me why was he angry? He could have cleared any misunderstanding with me because I was his friend first. But he never did that. Instead he started avoiding me. He tried avoiding me to such an extent that he wouldn’t even come for the annual reunions during Diwali just because I used to come there.

He never tried to contact me and it was me who tried to contact him. Years passed in this fashion. We had absolutely no direct contact. Sometime you just have to hold your head up high, blink away the tears and say good-bye. One day I decided to forget him and move on in my new life after finishing college. I spent my college life finding answers to some of the questions that life throws at us. I tried getting close to other people in my college but I was never able to come out of his thoughts. Some temporary phases of forgetting him, I diverted my mind in music, dance. But then again he used to resurface, his thoughts, his charm, everything in fact. In the process of finding my true self, I lost many relations including the love of a few very close friends just because I couldn’t love them back. After all, every relation expects love in return.

I think one cannot learn to forget, but hangs on the past: how far or fast he runs, that chain runs with him. My situation was also similar. Whatever I tried, I couldn't stop thinking about him. With passing time, the thoughts started changing and I got used to it.

Some 6 months later, I went home for a vacation. As usual, I was supposed to meet my friends during Diwali.

"Hi Sreya, Listen Rakshit is here too, He wants to meet you personally. Can you meet him tomorrow?" said one of our common friend ( his best friend) on phone. He told me that Rakshit wanted to meet me and he wanted both of us to be friends again (??!!?!). I didn't know what to reply .I could not find any answer and I agreed meeting him.

Next day I had to meet him.

The whole night I thought about my life - PAST, PRESENT & THE FUTURE. Someone had become a part of my life in those forgone years. 6 years was a long time. It took him 6 years to understand the basic fundamentals of friendship and love. So what if in the beginning he came to know I loved him, he would have told me if he didn’t have such thoughts on me, I would have accepted it gladly. We were close friends first and feelings developed later! He thought, we could still be friends.

I had achieved success in every field with the blessings of my parents and loved ones and in every happy phase of my life, my parents and friends stood by me. If I look back today, whenever I was sad, it was because of him. If I ever cried , it was because of him. I could find him in all the past moments of my life whenever I was in sorrow. Did he deserve another chance?? Or did he even deserve meeting me ever again? I asked this question to myself knowing that a part of me desperately wanted to meet him. But I knew, I had a clear answer.

The next day, I met every other friend of mine except him. Before leaving my hometown, I sent him a letter through my friend. The letter said

Rakshit,

You know I was not completely over you. You used to cross my mind several times a day, but with each one of those times, a feeling of contempt also used to pass through my heart. This happened enough, my heart became completely hardened to you, and I got to the point where you don't affect me anymore. Almost everything in life is easier to get out of, except when in love.

Getting out of love isn't that difficult too, if only you realize that the one who hurts you can never be the one who deserves you. I have learnt lessons in life over the years. There were reasons we met, reasons for the good times and reasons for the bad times, and most importantly a reason to end. We have more to learn, more to experience and more loving to do in this lifetime may be not together. I hope it teaches you some lesson!

Goodbye!

Sreya

And this time, Goodbye was forever! I never thought about him again the way I used to before this day.

I knew Love has taught me a lesson for life! Life moves on and you overcome challenges of love, attraction and obsession. I love my past. I love my present. I'm not ashamed of what I've had, and I'm not sad because I have it no longer. However mean your life is, meet it and live it: do not shun it and call it hard names.. Do not trouble yourself much to get new things or friends. Things do not change, we change. Friends don't change , situations change. If you are destined to get someone, you will get him/her and if you are not , you won’t ,even if you try. So leave it to God! Time is like a river. You cannot touch the same water twice, Because the flow that has passed will never pass again. So never waste time for people who are not worth it!

If I had my life to live over again, I will not change it because the life so far has taught me some of the best lessons of life, love and loss!

As I finished my story, I looked at Nandini. She was wearing a heavy smile on her face. "Mom, I love you", saying this she hugged me and I knew my daughter got all her answers!

At one point of time, we all would've had a heartbreak/grief. But when we start learning the bitter truth of life, we will really start loving the life. In this process, sometime we may sit near a window with a hot cup of tea, watch the drizzles of rain hitting your face, think of all those incidents which happened in our past. That will make you understand, though your past changed your course, it would've given you the best. Love your life and live it.

P.S : Hey how is this? Liked it eh?!

With Love,

Image Courtesy : Google Images

Do Svidaniya

This post was selected by blogadda as one of the Tangy Tuesday Pick. Thanks to all the readers who read this and to those who are going to read this. Many thanks to all!

Hi Mom,

How are you? Do you know who am I? Am your little kid. The one inside your womb. Am just 3 weeks old. Don't get surprised mom. Relax yourself. Know what? My hands and legs will develop soon mom. When I come out, I will be looking so good and not a Face only a mother could love. Why are you always crying mom? I can hear people near you are shouting and screaming at you. Why mom? My heart weeps every time you cry. I feel very secured when am inside you. I love you so much mom. I want to come out, go to school and become big. I always want to be near you. I want to see the happiness in your face when you see me. I can hear all the words you speak to me, but whenever I try to console you, you are not able to hear me.

I can hear someone telling you to kill me and rubbing salt into your wounds. No mom, please don't kill me. Dig in your heels, refuse their plans and their views as well. I will be a good kid to you and not a prankster. I can understand that nobody wants you to carry me inside you. Don't listen to them. Tell them that, I will take care of you when I become big. You will adore me when you see me. But am worried about you. You please take care. Ahh.. See mom, someone is coming near you. Mom what's happening here? You are weeping continuously. Ahh.. someone is coming near me as quiet as a mouse holding a big rod like thing in his hands. This monster seems to be dab hand with rods. Am terrified at the sight of this rod. The rod is coming so close to me mom. It has sharp ends. It may hurt you too mom. Mom, please save me mom. Someone is trying to kill me. Mom, save me from that monster. I don't have hands or legs to protect myself. God,you may have other fish to fry, but tell mom that I love her and ask her to save me from this monster. Mom, can't you hear me screaming? Am seeking your help. The dice are loaded against me. Help me please. Mom, that rod is scrapping me and my cells off you. Am bleeding now. It pains a lot mom. I will never get those hands and legs I told you. I won't become big. Above all, I can't see your lovely face. I won't see a new dawn. Ahh.. my bleeding is increasing now. Is it hurting you too? M...o....mmmmmm, Mommmm...Am going to die now. Please don't cry mom. I love you so much mom. Take care of your health. I am signing off before the last breath escapes from me.

Love you mom.

Yours Lovingly,

The Little Foetus scrapped off your womb.

Stop Abortion! I don't know how many liked this. My heart weighed a ton kilos while writing this post. This is just an insight of the fetus's mentality (Ofcourse which I imagined). The rod the child mentioned is termed as CURETTE, a surgical instrument.

P.S : The topic of this post-Do Svidaniya is a Russian phrase meaning GOODBYE. The fetus/kid is bidding adieu to this world.

With Love,

Image Courtesy : Google Images